I don't know what has come over me, but I have decided to confess.
Yep, confessing to the WORLD, or at least the 2 or 3 of you that actually read this...
My work space is OUT OF CONTROL!!!!
I was sick and tired of working out of the basement for all these years, although it has had its advantages--noone else EVER wanted to spend time down there,so I was usually left alone.
When 2 of our three delightful chicks, moved on to school and the city, I decided it
was my chance to break free from the shop lights and spiders and that little stream
of water that runs across the floor in the same spot every time it rains hard.
Oh, yes, I was PUMPED! I brought a beautiful old blue postal table home from my shop,
found a great vintage 2 piece German cupboard, 2 darling old chandeliers, quirky shelves,
and anything else I thought might work.
I loaded it all in and thought to myself, "This is going to be beautiful. I will be able to really create in all this light and beauty. It's going to be my little haven of loveliness. It's ALWAYS going to be neat and organized....it's going to be ME!'
Do you see that postal desk? CAN you see that postal desk---mmmhhhmmm...
the one that I have to glue the piece of wood back onto because I broke it off while moving it?
It's back there, under there,
behind the big ugly black desk chair,
next to the window air unit that one of my delightful children stacked in here---not in HIS room...,
above the piles thrown on the floor,
and next to that rumpled, NOT a fave quilt on the bed that another child slept in recently with no sheets or pillowcases.
My lovely, roomy, faded blue postal desk...
The one I'm supposed to sew on...
The one I'm supposed to create the most delightful goodies on...
The one I'm supposed to be able to SEE.
The one with NO organization, no beautiful inspiration board,
no darling chandelier and NO ROOM...not a milimeter!
And as if THIS weren't enough:
Here's another corner, more PILES...
and jars of dominoes, buttons, thread, rolls of fabric,
vintage Christmas, and I'm sure my sanity is under there somewhere...
You can pick your jaw up off your keyboard....
because there's MORE!
The wonderful 2 piece German cupboard.....
the one where the ribbons and french linen fabrics that I'm going to make into swoony items
.are supposed to be lovingly stacked and displayed.
The cupboard that is supposed to have JUST a few items of interest sitting on its crown.
The cupboard that I'm supposed to be able to GET INTO.....
There's a beutiful chair under that pile of blankets and throws to the left.
It was covered so delightfuly with them by that same child who came home and slept for ONE night.
WHY, OH WHY have I allowed you to see all of this MESS??????
I'm thinking :
I need intervention and am seeking.....anyone...
Actually, both of those are likely true....
The real reason?
I am an accountability person.
I, because of my own weakness, am unable to fully focus and complete daunting tasks,
unlesss I know that someone else will KNOW that I have//have not done them.
I like being organized and together.
I like having time to create and share.
I think more clearly and perform much better when I am surrounded with order.
So what's the hold up?
First, I can close the door and walk away.
Second, I've been taking care of the "urgent".
Third, it would be nice to have some kind friend who 'gets' me help
(but I don't want to torture anyone else)
Fourth, it's for ME.
If it were for someone else it would be DONE, FINITO, utterly, beautifully and completely FINISHED.
It would be delightful, the haven she dreamed of,
her own studio in the clouds, overlooking the gardens.
But, it's for ME...
I AM that cobbler who puts delightfully crafted shoes on everyone ELSE'S feet
while he and his family wear shoes that are tired and tattered.
It's for ME and now you know.
I'm not looking for a diagnosis here---I'm just puttin' out the truth.